“The Lord Said!”

“The Lord said…” Really, did He actually say that? I hear so many people tell me what the Lord has spoken to them. And, I honestly would like to say “Really, did He actually say that?” Well, to be more honest, I would like to say “You have got to be kidding. You actually believe the Lord said that to you?”

Let me make a bold statement. Christians listen for the Lord to speak in their soul. Their soul is their mind, will, and emotions. So, they usually hear what they want to hear. They hear what they think the Lord should be saying. They receive ‘permission’ to do what they were planning to do but now can do it with ‘God’s blessing.’ At least, that is what they honestly think. 

Believers need to stop using the Lord and “the Lord said” to back up what they believe and what they are wanting and planning to do. The majority of the time it is not the Lord. In the long run the results of “the Lord said” proves it was not the Lord at all – just your own mind, will, and emotions. At some point I would like to go back to these people and say, “So, how is that working out for you?” But, I don’t. 

Here is my take on this. Believers have something they want to do or become involved in. They think and pray about it. Then, they ‘hear God say’ that it is okay. You know, good plan; go there; do that, go for it (whatever ‘it’ is).” And, then they announce (key word) that the Lord said and off they go. When they announce “the Lord said” they are not looking for clarification or any input. Why would they? After all, the Lord told them to do this. So, it is an announcement of a completed event, decision, plan. 

Listen carefully. That is not how it works. If the Lord really says something it needs to be run past mature believers with whom you have a decent, open, and honest relationship. You know, an accountability partner or two. You run it past them and ask if this seems to them like the Lord is speaking. Is it what He would, at this time in the church and in the Kingdom, be speaking to you? Is it the right time in your life to be moving forward with what the Lord said? The right time relationally, financially, maturity wise? Is what the Lord saying biblical because, of course, if it is not then the voice is not the Lord speaking? He does not contradict His Word. And, what do your family members think about what you believe the Lord is speaking?

Here is a hint … you hear God in your spirit not in your head. God is Spirit (John 4) and the Holy Spirit lives in your born again spirit. So, when the Father wants to speak to you He speaks to / through the Holy Spirit who lives in your spirit. He does not speak to your soul as it is still in process and on a journey to becoming transformed and submitted to His will. Not there yet. 

So, you listen and hear His voice in your spirit and then it makes its way to your head. Your spirit hears God’s voice perfectly. The message is received 100% right and complete. But, on the way through your will and emotions into your mind only a detail or two gets through. And, often even those details get a little mixed up. So, you then need to learn how to release what you have received in your spirit into your mind so that you actually understand the whole substance of what God revealed to you. That process is material for a future blog. 

If you are not dealing with emotional issues like unforgiveness, greed, resentment, anger, bitterness, offences then these things in your soul will distort what the Lord has spoken and you will miss the message entirely. God might have said white but you hear black. So, the soul need to be kept clean … your mind needs to be transformed by the Word of God; your will must be submitted to God’s will and His plan for your life; your emotions must be yielded to the Holy Spirit and brought into line with Scripture. 

Too often we move fast forward on what we believe the Lord spoke when really it was simply our will speaking, our emotions working overtime, or our mind thinking ahead without knowing or understanding the Lord’s thoughts – which, by the way, are much different and higher than our thoughts.

Just a few things to consider before the next time you are wanting to say, “The Lord said.”

Character Is Foundational

Just this week I spent time on the phone with another apostle and then a conference call with two apostles regarding a person in ministry who needs to step down from all leadership responsibilities. 

This is a man whom we have worked with and supported over a number of years. We have encouraged him to make changes in his character and even offered help in some areas to enable him to do so. Areas such as finances and family. However, he has not taken the necessary action to improve and change. So, he is being asked to step down and focus on the issues that are needing attention.

So often in ministry we look at gifting and anointing. We determine the person’s call and begin to move them in the direction of fulfilling their call. We disciple, train, equip, and even mentor those who have a definite call upon their life to enter the fivefold ministry. However, more foundational than giftings, skills, knowledge, anointing, and calling is character. It is foundational to everything. Not just for leaders but for all believers.

Character involves a number of things … Let’s list them for a quick understanding of some of the elements of a person’s life that we might look at when determining and working with a person’s character.

      • Family – How are they doing with their family members? Do they love and respect this person?
      • Finances – Is this person a good manager of their money, paying their bills on time, living within their means, and tithing as well as giving to the work of the ministry?
      • Friends – Who are they relating to as friends? as “Bad company corrupts good morals”
      • Fun – What does this person do for fun and how do they spend their spare time?
      • Fruit – Do they exhibit the fruit of the Spirit (Galatians 5:22-23)
      • Fruitfulness – Are they influencing people and seeing people come into the Kingdom?
      • Faith – What are they believing God for – standing in faith regarding?
      • Faithfulness – Are they regular in their devotional life, church attendance, and ministry obligations?

As we work with people, see how they relate to and treat other people, and come to know them and their family better, we begin to see the character of the person. This character is the foundation for any and all ministry. Without it established and in place, functioning correctly, the person will not be successful in their ministry and in influencing others for the Kingdom. And, the Lord as well as the Church will, once again, be seen in a negative light in society and among non-believers. They do notice, by the way.

So, the most loving thing we can do is remove a person who, after a season of failing to develop and change these basic character issues – even when offered and given support and help – is to have them step down from all ministry. This frees them to focus on and work with these basic elements of their character. 

Of course, this action of removing someone from a leadership position may not appear to be a loving decision. Be that as it may, the removal is needed because the person has not cooperated nor responded to the help and direction being offered to them. They apparently are not teachable. They are not interested in being mentored. The leaders, in this case three apostles, have walked the extra mile or two with this person and spoken the truth in love many times. It is now time to move forward and release this person so they can decide what it is they really want to do and how committed they are to doing it. 

Character is foundational. God has called his children, not just His leaders, to be Christ-like in all of their behaviour and interaction with others. Our heavenly Father is desiring that we represent Him well amongst those who do not believe.

Let’s Get Biblical

In a recent discussion I mentioned that the word “revival” did not appear in the New Testament. It may be there as a heading in certain versions of the Bible but the headings were added by men and are not part of the inspired Word of God. We were looking at the way we as human beings attempt to make things happen instead of just waiting on the Lord and responding to what He is currently doing. And, He is always doing something in our lives and church assemblies.

So, I was commenting that revivals are not found in the New Testament and that the early believers simply lived radical and revolutionary lives, sharing the good news with people and the Holy Spirit moved in amazing ways. A God-wave of the Spirit verses a man-made wave or emotion and hype that we call revival.

As I shared someone asked about Charles Finney, known as a revivalist, and his revivals. I mentioned that they were called Awakenings not revivals. But, really that was not an adequate answer. A better answer would be to go back to Bible once again. In the Bible we do not see the role of “revivalist.” We have five main ministries – apostle, prophet, evangelist, pastor, and teacher. These are the fivefold ministry or the ascension gift ministries Jesus gave to the Church. They represent the fullness of Jesus’s ministry while ministering for three years in Galilee. It seems we don’t think they are enough so we invent other ministries – revivalist, intercessor, burden bearers, exorcists, priests, and the list goes on.

So, man has made up the term ‘revivalist’ just as we have created this vehicle called “revivals.” We even schedule revivals. They last several weeks and run in the summer. They are a means to bring the lost into the Kingdom. The Old Testament revivals had nothing to do with the lost – they were simply to call God’s people back to God. A call to repent. John the Baptist had such a ministry as the Old Covenant was coming to a close and Jesus was about to start the new covenant between the human race and God our Father. We call it a revival. John saw it as a call to repentance.

So, in church life today we have youth revivals, laughing revivals, prayer revivals, tent revivals, church revivals, spring revivals, fall revivals… One church I visited recently has every Friday night revivals with coffee and cookies nonetheless. Add to the revivals such events as “Burn” nights of worship that have sprung up all over North America. There are a vast number of man-made events that continue to pop up and occupy a great deal of the limited time people have today. It keeps the believers busy and occupied, feeling good about what they are doing for God and the Kingdom.

It might be good to cut back on these events that we don’t see in the New Testament Church. Recognize them as religion for in many ways that is what they are. Our attempt to please God and convince Him to do something that we think needs to be done. And, then, free up the believers to become involved in what the Lord has expressly told us that we must do.

He told us to “seek and save the lost” going “into all the world and making disciples.” This, in most cases, is not the focus of believers and the local assembly. We are busy instead waiting and praying for the next move of the Spirit. When, in reality, He is busy moving the hearts of the lost, convicting them of sin so that they would respond and repent and come into the Kingdom. We need to join Him in what He is already doing and commanded us to do … and that is biblical.

It would be good to look at and examine what we believe and what we are doing in our churches to see if it is really biblical. So much of what we do and the activities that we can become involved in are simply man-made programs in an attempt to have a move, a new wave, of the Spirit. Let’s just build deep in our relationship with the Lord and obey Him as we go about our daily lives. Opportunities abound to build solid relationships within which we can then share the Gospel. This is what the Lord is calling all of us to do.

Some are writing on Facebook that revival is here. It is not. Some are constantly praying for revival. Not the way they happen. If you want a revival then go out and do what Jesus told us to do. Get a few people born again, begin to disciple them, and watch how that revives your love for Him and commitment to His command to make disciples in your family and community and even the wider world.

Revival

I was recently at a church in Canada. One that was new to me. I enjoyed my time with them and we connected, as pastors and leaders often do, exchanging email addresses and cell phone numbers. A follow-up to it was that I was asked to befriend the leader on Facebook and then ended up having a closer look at the man and his church on their Facebook page. Great way to see what is happening or not happening and to help form an opinion or two as we begin building relationally.

I am amazed how many churches are advertising “revivals.” I shouldn’t be shocked or surprised as often they talk about revival over coffee, pray for revival, and hold regular revival services. I have always found that to be interesting. In earlier centuries the Church would schedule revivals. They would advertise that they were coming up and ask people to mark their calendars. Then there would be a series of special services usually with a guest speaker. People would attend and some would even get born again. This practice continues in some Christian circles through to today.

There were a number of major revivals in the Old Testament. God would send His messenger to call His nation back to their God. So, Israel would assemble, the prophet would preach, and people would repent and turn back to worshipping their God once again. This was God calling His nation back to Him. He selected the time and place and announced it through His spokesperson, the prophet. It was not planned and scheduled by man. It was something God initiated. The last revival was when John the Baptist called God’s people back to Him in preparation for the coming of the Messiah, Jesus the Christ. 

Interesting to note that there are no references to “revivals” in the New Testament other than John’s. And, that was initiated by God and was still under the Old Covenant because Jesus had yet to die on the Cross and thus the New Covenant had yet start.  

Under the New Covenant, God no longer had a nation to call back to Him through repentance. Now He has a people who were, in time, scattered throughout many nations. These people were very much alive and in a personal relationship with Him. When they repented and turned to God He poured His love and His life into them. They were alive; vibrant and enthusiastic about God and the things of God. So alive that they spread the message of the Gospel of the Kingdom throughout the then known world and more than half the Roman Empire claimed Christ as their Lord by the year 300. No revival – just believers fulfilling the command of Christ to “go into al the world and make disciples.”

However, some still hold revivals today expecting non-believers to come and receive Christ as their Lord and Saviour. And yet, this is not what revivals are really all about. You do not revive something that has never been spiritually alive. Revivals should, if you are going to have them at all, should be focused on turning the church members back to God. The focus should be believers returning to the ‘life’ they once received and experienced. This ‘life’ now needing to be revived. They were not meant to see the lost saved. 

Saving the lost is accomplished through Christians building relationships with the unsaved and showing them the love of God. Eventually, having won their trust and respect then sharing the Gospel verbally as spiritual questions are asked and people begin to have an interest in finding out more regarding the God we believe in, worship, and serve. 

However, we still hold tent revivals, church revivals, youth revivals, spring revivals, fall revivals… focusing on seeing the lost come to the Cross and receive Christ. They are man-made programs designed to grab the attention of the unsaved. And who are kidding – do we really believe a sign saving “Revival Service Tonight” is going to attract an unsaved person. And, advertising “coffee and Cookies” isn’t exactly a drawing card either. 

We are apparently missing the fact that in the early Church there were no revivals. Just on-fire, enthusiastic, and obedient believers who spread the fire through their lifestyle and their words. No revival needed to do this.  

Instead of praying for revival why don’t we pray what Jesus told us to pray… that there would be more workers reporting for duty in the fields already ripe for harvest. 

Code Blue

My wife has recently had a total knee transplant and so was in hospital for a few long days of preparation, operation, initial recovery, and therapy. She is now home slowly, very slowly, returning to normal. But, she is home and we are thankful to God and to the doctors and nurses that took such good care of her.

Each day as I sat there during the various stages of her stay in the hospital; each day I heard a “Code Blue” call over the hospital intercom system. It is spoken out a minimum of three times along with the floor, ward, room, and bed number. And, it means someone’s heart has stopped. The race is on to revive a life. Of course, we never knew if it was successful or not. But, it did make me stop and think.

We are often so focused on our issues. After all, my wife was in the hospital for a long awaited knee replacement. There were some risks. There would be a fair amount of pain. There would be a seriously long recovery from the operation with physiotherapy on a regular basis. We had already been through classes, had home visits by various people – physiotherapist, pharmacist, nurse, and on the list could go. It has been an ordeal. It has been a serious focus in our life and home for many months. Many changes have had to happen. Many more changes will now begin to be required to accommodate recovery.

But “Code Blue.” That means someone’s heart has stopped. That means they are as close to the edge of eternity as you can get and not permanently cross over into the next life. Code Blue means your life, or death, is in the hands of those who have been trained for these types of situations. They call the machinery that goes with the Code Blue the crash cart. So, the person is about to crash out of this life permanently and into the next life. That leaves much room for thought.

Is this person ready for the next life? Has a believer built a solid relationship with them over the length of their current life which might now be ending permanently? And, has this believer been successful at sharing the love of God in practical ways as well as in words? Has the person heard the good news of the Gospel of the Kingdom in such a way that they understood what God was offering to them through His grace and the death of Jesus, His Son? In other words, is this person ready to (permanently) die and meet His Creator?

Often we, as believers, are so focused on the details and circumstances of our daily life that we forget that others have not heard the good news that ‘Jesus saves.’ In a world full of church buildings many have never heard and thus never considered the real message of the Christian faith. In spite of all the Christian radio and television that is available 24/7 most non-believers do not listen to the programs. And, even if they did, most programs do not present the Gospel. In fact, most Christian broadcasting speaks to Christians and not non-believers and a lot of what is presented is not biblical. 

Maybe the person who is now “Code Blue” has been a church attender all their life; that is really irrelevant. If the person has not been born again and thus does not have a personal relationship with the Living Lord Jesus … all the church attendance in the world will not suffice to bring them into Heaven. And, again, many many churches do not believe or preach the foundational message of salvation through Jesus Christ and Him alone. 

We who are believers are so personally preoccupied with what seems to us at the time our personal “life and death situations” that we are not focused on building relationships with non-believers so that they can see the true gospel of the Kingdom lived out in front of them. And, most believers do not believe that it is their task to share the gospel verbally. In fact, statistics and surveys show that many do not believe in evangelism at all. So, their faith becomes a private matter and not shared with others.

So, “Code Blue” reminds me that there is a powerful message that needs to be shared with those with whom we share a relationship. It is the Gospel of the Kingdom and it “is the power of God unto salvation.” And, we never know when one of the people we know and love will face their own “Code Blue” and, if they do, it might be too late to share the love of God with them.  

The Journey

I believe that life is a journey. And, that on this journey we should always be moving forward. That means we should be learning, growing, changing, becoming more mature. I am in my early seventies and I am continuing to change and grow. I have a hunger to read and learn. I am interested in so many things and want to experience new things on at least a weekly basis. I get bored really fast and this helps me to continue to move forward on the journey.

I recently read an amazing and candid book called “Becoming” by Michele Obama. I am not a political person and read it because it was recommended highly by my sister and her adult daughter. It was an amazing read. Michelle Obama is an amazing writer and has had an amazing life both before and after her eight years as First Lady of the United States of America.

In her book, the epilogue, she writes, “At fifty-four, I am still in progress, and I hope that I always will be. For me, becoming isn’t about arriving somewhere or achieving a certain aim. I see it instead as forward motion, a means of evolving, a way to reach continuously toward a better self. The journey doesn’t end. I became a mother, but I still have a lot to learn from and give to my children. I became a wife, but I continue to adapt to and be humbled by what it means to truly love and make a life with anther person. I have become, by certain measures, a person of power, and yet there are moments still when I feel insecure or unheard. It is all a process, steps along a path. Becoming requires equal parts patience and rigour. Becoming is never giving up on the idea that there’s more growing to be done.” (Becoming by Michelle Obama, page 419)

One of my first mentors always said that many people suffer from “Destination Disease.” They set a goal and work hard to achieve it. And, when they achieve it they begin to live like they have arrived. They have reached their destination. They don’t set new goals. They don’t find a new vision for their life. They simply, at best, coast through the rest of their life … or park and stop growing.

When I first heard the teaching and then later read it in one of his books I determined that I would never “arrive.” I would never catch “Destination Disease.” I want to continue growing, developing, maturing, learning. So, I set goals. One consistent goal is to read a book a week. If the book is a shorter one – under 200 pages – then I read two during that week. I read because I need to. There is an inner hunger to learn more, to grow, to develop. And, there is so much one can learn from others just by reading. I make time to read. Anyone can do that as well if they want to. 

The current younger generation seems to not want to or like to read. I recommend books to the young men I disciple and mentor and they admit that they have not read a book in years. Some don’t try. Those that do quickly fall in love with reading and thus growing through reading. Those that don’t almost always stop the discipling / mentoring relationship. They just, at this stage in their life, don’t see the need to read. Maybe they are growing and maturing through what they watch on You Tube and listen to on their smart phone. Maybe not. But, there is such potential for growth and maturity if the individual will simply pick up a book, get alone, and immerse themselves in the discoveries of others. 

Of course, I drag a paper copy of the book around with me. I am never without a book in my car. You never know when you might find 15 minutes to read while waiting for someone or something. And, I have graduated to ebooks as well. Partly because I have run out of shelf space and am almost out of floor space so cannot stack many more paper books. Partly because of convenience and it weighs less when travelling by plane. The new eReaders are waterproof which makes reading while camping and kayaking a pleasure. 

So, we are all on a journey. Hopefully you believe that you never arrive but just keep learning and growing. And, books are my prime way to learn and to grow. 

Focus

 

FOCUS
I was researching “wave pools” this week…
In the middle of Texas – Waco, Texas – there is a Surf Ranch.
Every 90 seconds a new wave breaks in all directions of the pool
There is an actual guarantee that you will have waves that you can surf
The Wave Pool

(3.5 minutes)

Read more

Treat People Better Than They Treat You

In 1842, thirteen-year-old William Booth’s life changed. His father, Samuel Booth, lost his business. The elder Booth had once been a nail maker, but when his trade became the victim of mass production, he started a business as a small-time builder. Unfortunately, recurring recessions took their toll, and finally Booth went out of business. It put him and his family into difficult circumstances. As a result, William Booth, who had grown up in a household with enough money to have him educated, was sent out to learn a trade. He was apprenticed to a pawnbroker in a seedy part of Nottingham, England.

“Make money,” was the advice of Booth’s father, who died bankrupt the next year. Booth did learn about making money while learning his trade. But his apprenticeship also gave him another kind of education. Working in a pawnbroker’s shop, he was in daily contact with the poor and destitute. One biography noted, “He learned as from a primer what poverty did to people.” It’s no coincidence that during his years as an apprentice, he became a person of faith – a Christian.

In 1849, Booth moved to London and took a position in a pawnshop in a poor area south of the Thames River. But after only three years, he gave up his trade and became a minister. He saw faith as the solution to the problems of those who were struggling to survive. And he embarked on a lifelong mission  that had two objectives: saving lost souls and righting social injustices.

At first he became a Methodist New Connection minister, then a travelling evangelist. But in 1865 when some people from the area heard him preach in front of the Blind Beggar Pub in East London, he was recruited to become part of a tent ministry that came to be called the Christian Mission.

From there, Booth ministered to the poorest people in London. The East End contained half of the paupers, homeless, and starving in London. His early converts were some of the most desperate types of people: thieves, prostitutes, gamblers, and drunkards. He was trying to make a difference, but his efforts were not met with appreciation, even from the very people he was trying to help.

He and his fellow workers were harassed and brutalized. Local tavern keepers worked especially hard to undermine his efforts. Even street children threw stones and fireworks through the windows of their meeting hall. Booth’s wife, Catherine said that he would “stumble home night after night, haggard with fatigue. Often his clothes were torn and bloody, bandages swathed his head where a stone had struck.” But Booth would not retaliate in kind. He refused to give up.

Booth worked to feed the poor, house the homeless, and share his faith. His organization continued to grow. By 1867, he had ten full-time workers. By 1874, more than one thousand volunteers and forty-two evangelists worked with him. In 1878 when they reorganized, Booth gave the group a new name. From then on, the organization would be called the Salvation Army. 

Unfortunately, that didn’t stop the group’s opponents. Booth was labeled “anti-Christ” by the reformer Lord Shaftesbury. An opposition group formed to try and stop Booth and his associates. They came to call themselves the Skeleton Army. An article in the Bethnal Green Eastern Post in November 1882 described them:

“A genuine rabble of ‘roughs’ pure and unadulterated has been infesting the district for several weeks past. These vagabonds style themselves the ‘Skeleton Army’ … The object of the skeleton army was to put down the Salvationists by following them everywhere, by beating a drum and burlesquing their songs, to render the conduct of their processions and services impossible … Amongst the skeleton rabble there is a large percentage of … loafers and unmitigated blackguards … [and] the disreputable class of publicans who hate the London school board, education, and temperance, and who, seeing the beginning of the end of the immoral traffic [sic] and prepared for the most desperate [sic] enterprise.”

Despite the horrible treatment they received, the officers and volunteers in the Salvation Army persevered, and they helped hundreds of thousands of people. Often they converted the very individuals who had persecuted them. 

In 1912, William Booth, then age eighty-three, delivered his last public address. In it he stated his commitment to investing in people:

“While women weep as they do now, I’ll fight; while little children go hungry as they do now, I’ll fight; while men go to prison, in and out, in and out, as they do now, I’ll fight; while there is a drunkard left, while there is a poor lost girl on the streets, while there remains one dark soul without the light of God, I’ll fight – I’ll fight to the very end.”

Three months later, he died. As one observer put it, the “general” who had led the Salvation Army for more than thirty years was ‘promoted to glory.’

William Booth spent a lifetime treating people better than they treated him. And as a result, he lived on the highest level, personally and unprofessionally. He travelled the high road. 

There are really only three roads we can travel when it comes to dealing with others. We can take

        • The low road – where we treat others worse than they treat us
        • The middle road – where we treat others the same as they treat us
        • The high road – where we treat others better than they treat us

The low road damages relationships and alienates others from us. The middle road may not drive people away from us, but it won’t attract them to us either; it is reactive rather than proactive and allows others to set the agenda for our lives. The high road helps to create positive relationships and attracts others to us; it sets a positive agenda with others that even negative people find difficult to undermine. 

We, as believers, need to work at taking the high roads with others every day. Treat people better than they treat you!

Do People Like You?

As believers we are called to share the love of God and the Gospel of the Kingdom with others who have yet to experience God’s amazing grace. To do this we need to build solid relationships with people so that they know they are important. We need to learn how to treat everyone with dignity and respect iso that they will grow to trust you.

For this to even begin you need to come across as ‘likeable.’ And, regretfully, many believers are simply not likeable. So, here are some things we can adapt into our lives to become more likeable and approachable.

1> Become genuinely interested in other people

Often we are so wrapped up in our own life – our issues, our circumstances, our problems – that we really come across as distant and not interested in how others are doing. More importantly, we come across as not even interested in who they really are. One of my mentors taught me many years ago: “People don’t care how much you know until they know how much you care.” It doesn’t matter how much power, education, or expertise you possess; people will respond to you more favourably if you first let them know that they matter to you as individuals.

2> Smile

A smile is inviting. To appear that you are interested in another person and actually care about them you need to make eye contact with them and do so with a smile. Research has shown that the eye contact alone is not enough. Eye contact says you are treating them as a person and they are important to you. You really want to connect. Add to that a sincere smile. You must smile as it is the smile that says you are a warm and caring person.

3> Remember that a person’s name is to him or her the sweetest and most important sound

I personally have trouble remembering peoples names. And, so I work hard at listening carefully when I first hear it. Then, if possible, I repeat it to myself a number of times or find some way to associate the name with the face or the person. I don’t always remember a name but at least I am trying. It is important as people like it when we call them by name the second time we meet them.

4> Be a good listener – encourage others to talk about themselves.

Remember that a person’s favourite topic is themselves. So, encourage them to talk about themselves and share some of their life story with you. 

Someone once wrote: “Try to care about something in this vast world besides the gratification of small selfish desires. Try to care for what is best in thought and action – something that is good apart from the accidents of your own lot. Look on other lives besides your own. See what their troubles are, and how they are borne.”  (Novelist George Eliot)

How do you take that advice to heart? By listening!

5> Talk in terms of the other person’s interests

To win in relationships, a person needs to learn to talk in terms of the other person’s interests. That’s true when meeting somebody for the first time, and it is true when you are building a long-term relationship.

One of the keys is what author Tony Allesandra calls the Platinum Rule. You probably know the Golden Rule: do unto others as you would have them do unto you. The Platinum Rule says, “Treat others the way they want to be treated.” Do that, and you almost can’t go wrong.

6> Make the other person feel important, and do it sincerely

The bottom line is that you need to make others feel important. And, anyone can learn to value people and make them feel important. It seldom comes naturally as most of us are too focused on ourselves. 

We can learn this relational ability. This ability has been called “Woo.” Woo stands for ‘winning over others.’ I believe that individuals who have “woo” are drawn to people and “want to learn their names, ask them questions, and find some area of common interest so that they can strike up a conversation and build rapport. Woo is a natural strength that you have or you don’t. However, I believe that any person can develop people skills and learn to have charisma.

When talking about charisma – and that is what this blog has been all about – it all boils down to this: the person without charisma walks into a group and says, ‘Here I am.’ The person with charisma walks into a group and says, ‘There you are.’

Just about anyone can learn to do that. If you want to be the kind of person who makes others smile when they see you coming, get outside yourself, change your focus, and become interested in others. Doing these six things will change your life. 

Flooded With Life and Overflowing

The Bible states that “In Him (Jesus) was life and that life was the light of men” (John 1:4). Jesus was not the ‘light.’ The very life, character, and nature of God (the Father) in Him was the light. This is called the ‘life.’ Jesus was not the light – the life in Him was the light.

This theme of ‘life’ is amazingly throughout the New Testament. He came that we might have life and have it more abundantly. He told us that He was the way, the truth, and the life. His gift of grace is eternal life. 

When we are born again this life is deposited within us. Jesus said to the woman at the well of Sycar, “For when you drink the water I give you it becomes a gushing fountain of the Holy Spirit, springing up and flooding you with endless life!” (John 4:14 The Passion Translation).

Christians have life – the very character and nature of God dwelling inside them. The Holy Spirit was deposited in to you when you asked Jesus to be your Lord and Saviour and experienced a conversion to Christ. He is the One that breathes life in you (Romans 5:5). And, as believers who live His life and live with hope we should be enthusiastically engaged with life every day. We should be enthusiastic and excited about life and the opportunities each day brings to us. We are to be proactive and embracing life and celebrating all that God has and is doing in and through us. 

When non-believers look at us they should see people who are consistently excited and “up” as we join the Spirit of God in what He is doing that day. We are not victims. We are not overcome by our circumstances. Even on a tough day we need to remember that God is still in control and He does know what He is doing. We need to be ‘alive’ and on fire for God. We need to walk in His life.

But, there is more than just a ‘gushing fountain’ that enables us to move forward with hope and certainty every day. There is a second encounter with God that the Bible calls the Baptism in the Holy Spirit. Jesus talked about it on a number of occasions. One of the first times He mentions it is in John 7 when He is speaking at the celebration of a Jewish religious feast day and He says, “All you thirsty ones, come to Me! Come to Me and drink! Believe in Me so that rivers of living water will burst out from within you, flowing from your inner most being, just like the Scripture says!” (John 7:37b-38 The Passion Translation referring to Ezekiel 47:1, Isaiah 44:3; 55:1; 58:11).

These rivers don’t seem to be flowing as Jesus predicted. Many who are baptized in the Holy Spirit focus on such great gifts as praying in tongues. However, they are not grasping the immensity of what Jesus said here. There is so much ‘life,’ His life in us that it is busting the seams and flowing out to touch all others we come into contact with. There is more than enough for each and every person we speak to each and every day. But, you may ask, why is this not the case? Good question. 

The reference to living waters flowing from within could have been translated as: “rives of living water will flow from His throne within” (see Ezekiel 47) 

And, many believers – even those baptized in the Holy Spirit – do not have Jesus as Lord sitting on the throne of their heart. And they are still functioning in life as if it was up to them and that they are seriously in control of their life. So, Jesus has not been enthroned as Lord. The throne is occupied by ‘self’ and thus this abundant life flowing like multiple rivers is not experienced. 

Jesus came full of life and this life was the light of men. This life in us is meant to be the light for others who are living in spiritual darkness. But, they won’t see the light if we are not daily experiencing and then overflowing with His life that is ours because we have asked Jesus to be God in our life. Jesus said, “Your lives light up the world. Let others see your light from a distance, for how can you hide a city that stands on a hilltop?” (Matthew 5:14 The Passion Translation). In other words, shine so brightly that people will see the difference from far away and it will get brighter as they come closer. 

So, as believers, we are called to celebrate life, His life in us, and to release that life so it can light up the spiritual darkness that surrounds those who don’t know Jesus. We are meant to be flooded with life and overflowing.